TWL Jewish Insults

Who is one candle short of a Menorah?

Who will NEVER find the Afikomen?

Well, ________, it seems that YOU are the simple son.

Whose Havdalah candle is a bit too twisted?

Who has already drank their four cups of wine?

Whose challah bread has come unbraided?

Which one of you will not be written in the Book of Life?

Who among us won't make it across the Red Sea?

Well, __________, even in the Dead Sea you'd sink. ______, are you still fasting? 

Well, _________, do you feel guilty?  You should.

Who's dreidel is spinning the slowest?

_____, you're certainly not the shiniest candlestick on the table.

Whose Shabbat candles have gone out?

Well, ______, you certainly didn't eat from the Tree of Knowledge.

Even Balaam's ass could answer THAT question.

(for an insulting contestant) Do you kiss your mezuzzah with that mouth?

Apparently Moses forgot to tell you that "Do not be stupid" is the eleventh commandment.

I'm afraid you've missed the Ark with that answer.

Who thought Tupak Shakur was a Jewish holiday? Sounds like someone needs another bar-mitzvah!

Whose dreidel landed on nun?

Whose house did Elijah pass over?

Who got a little too drunk on Purim?

Whose message fell out of the Western wall?

Who thinks Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob are the names of the three musketeers?

 The rabbis say that all 600,000 Jews stood at the foot of Mt. Sinai to recieve the wisdom of the Torah.  Apparently, only 599,999 actually MADE it.  

_______, don't you wish this was Simchat Torah so we could just start from the beginning?  Well, it's not.  You ARE the Weakest Link... good-bye!
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